Thursday, August 25, 2011


First I have to start this post by saying that my sweet Ava and I have broken down some more of the wall today. We still have a long way to go in our bonding and her trust in me. But everyday is an improvement. This morning when she awoke she stood up in her crib and let me know she had to go to the potty. So I put my arms out and she put hers up so I could pick her up. That was a huge step for my sweet girl. And I got tons and tons of smiles. We laughed and played and she looks deeper and deeper into my eyes every day. But once we leave our hotel room she still will not hold my hand or let me carry her. So...we still have a ways to go. But when we were at lunch today, she let me take her out of Tony's sight so I could take her to the potty...which was all the way downstairs. So I would was another very good day. She let me feed her and she sat on my lap at lunch. It took a little while and she still reached for Tony but...she stayed and we bonded a little more. And when we got back to our hotel room after a long day of touring and dinner...we played and played and laughed and laughed. I am confidant that she is learning to trust me. She didn't look over to make sure Tony was there...she was content with just me and our bonding.

Today was our last full day in Changchun, Jilin Province, China. So we toured a little since we haven't really done so since we came here on Sunday. Our day trip consisted of the Emperor's Palace Puppet Museum which was established in 1962. And we went to a zoo since we thought the kids would enjoy seeing the animals and getting out a little bit. Well I don't know what happened but Ava was in a great mood this morning...laughing and playing...and showing us more of her personality. But as soon as we entered the zoo until the time we left...she shut down...completely shut down. Our guide kept asking me what was wrong with her. She was walking around in a daze...with a deeply sad look on her face. She didn't want to look at the animals and didn't want to be there in general. I wonder what my sweet girl was thinking? Did she remember her foster Mama today? Did her foster Mama take her to the zoo often? It was almost like the zoo brought her back to a place that she didn't want to be. Because as soon as we left and got into our van...she completely changed. Sweet Ava was playing and laughing and smiling. Our guide said that she cannot believe the difference between the van and the zoo. We all agree that it must have reminded her of her past. She wasn't even seeking her security which is Tony...she didn't want his hand...she was so distant. Tony and I both feel...we just need to leave Jilin Province...we need to get our girl out of that she can begin to heal.

We received such a special gift today. Our guide gave our family and Jackson's family a memory book that was put together by their head teacher in their school. It has memories and pictures and milestones and hand prints and foot prints and drawings going back from May 26th 2010 all the way until Gotcha day. It was put together with such love and came with an English translation. We also learned that the school that Ava attended is sponsored by the Half the Sky Foundation. Which is how Ava's memory book was created. "Half the Sky Foundation was created to enrich the lives and enhance the prospects for orphaned children in China. The Foundation establishes and operates infant nurture and preschool programs, provides personalized learning for older children and establishes loving, permanent care and guidance for children with disabilities. Half the Sky's goal is to ensure that every orphaned child has a caring adult in her life and a chance at a bright future." This gift is such a special blessing for our daugter. Again...another piece of her past that she will long for when she is older.

We are leaving tomorrow for yet another flight for the last leg of our journey. We will be flying 4 1/2 hours to Guangzhou to finish up the rest of the paperwork...get Ava's Visa...take her for a medical exam and go to our oath taking ceremony. I am sad to be leaving Jilin because I am taking my daughter away from the only place she has called home. But we need to move on. Our fragile little girl needs to move on and begin her new life with us.


Anonymous said...

So happy, things are falling into place nicely .... I have asked my praying friends to pray for her to be able to trust you and for the bonding to happen easily.... I so enjoy your posts and look forward to seeing the photos....
Aunt Ann

Anonymous said...

I am so glad things are better. I have been praying extra hard! My mother told me the other day, that when they adopted me, I would push her away every time she went to hug me. It broke her heart, I am sure, but she said I learned to trust her more and more each day. I too read your post daily and enjoy them. Ava is just beautiful ! Will continue to go to Him each day :)


Anonymous said...

Very cute pics of Ava--Happy you're bonding with her.Stay safe!
Love You ---DAD

thegrandparents said...

She is so beautiful, and I'm sorry that you had a few bad days.. all it takes is time, how could she not love you and feel comfortable, she just needs her time to adapt... just wait til she meets lainey... I can't wait to see them both together. hope you are having a good time, and that lainey is having fun with grandma... i'm sure that she is being spoiled... grandma I would do the same... give her a hug and kiss for me!